I would go into William’s General Store and take what I needed. I was poor. I didn’t pay. I simply stuck whatever it was in my trousers and walked out the door. It was a different time and the “loss prevention” techniques of today were not yet in place. Folks just took you at your word. And I took advantage of that.

After years of doing this, I realized the error of my ways. You can’t just take thing from places because you want to. I decided to pull myself up by my bootstraps and start providing for myself (legally). People had always told me I was a funny man—life of the party, you know? So, I decided to become a comic. I did a couple shows at a local open mic night. At the third of these shows, some talent scouts from the big city happened to be in the crowd. They told me I had what it took to be rich and famous. I started working on a sketch comedy show and, well, the rest is history. I’ll never forget how good it felt to get that first paycheck, go back to William’s General Store, and buy a large soda and a bag of chips. With money that I earned.

And that’s the story of how I became a comic because I was tired of robbin’ William’s.